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I Am the King of the Common Cold – and I'm Able to Reveal How to Avoid One

Around this period a year ago, I ended up participating in a broadcast in the company of three performers. There was a hip-hop artist with Ghanaian roots, a big pop star, and an acclaimed classical singer. The coldest season was upon us. The previous evening, I attended a longtime friend's 60th birthday, crammed into the function room of a pub somewhere in Surrey. The festivities were fun, but now, to break the silence, I pondered ways to dodge the common cold as numerous attendees were contributing to a chorus of sniffles and coughs. On a side note, how come some people have nose-blows like trumpets, and some do not? Something to explore later.

Their Take from the Singers

At mention of my night out, these three musicians in the waiting area took two actions. First, they edged away from me. Next, they started a passionate debate on how to avoid catching colds which understandable due to their profession was a major concern for them. I understand that, but I have skin in this game too – I must avoid colds at all costs because the colds I get are worse than anyone else’s. I lack official documentation, but I firmly believe it. My colds last longer. My nose is more blocked, my throat is scratchier, I suffer from louder, more relentless coughing spells. Those at home, alert to the initial throat noises that signal an oncoming cold, often shoo me away or leave themselves. Back when I presented football on ITV, the unfortunate crew in the control room learned to recognize the signals. “Headphones off!” the producer would yell to his team before I deafened them all, damaging their headset equipment.

Managing Stuffy Noses

When it comes to congestion, don’t start me. Aerosols, liquids, even the electric shock of fumes of boiling plum brandy my mom advocates … they all work for a while before giving up. It's hard to find something more pathetic as the sound of a Birmingham accent uttered with blocked nasal passages. I mean, it's somewhat nasal on a good day. On the plus side, it draws pity, which isn't ideal. During my initial university year, separated from family care, the cleaner in our halls of residence took pity on me. “I have the perfect solution, you dear. Be right back.” She was very lovely, distinctly Irish, and very insistent that I ate the uncooked, peeled onion she offered me in bed. She observed me eating it. Bless her. It didn't help at all, unfortunately, other than causing digestive turmoil and creating bad breath.

The Singer’s Cold Avoidance Regime

So no, I loathe winter illnesses and am quite sure that prevention is better than the cures which traditional or modern, don’t work. I listened intently along with the rapper and the pop star as the singer detailed her prevention methods. With seasonal gigs on the schedule, she was highly committed. She instructed us to sanitize hands regularly throughout the winter based on her explanation in addition, specific measures were necessary when it came to parties and what not. Before any event, she recommended a couple of blasts of a preventive product into both nostrils – whether you felt a cold coming or not. Intense. I appreciated it. And, listen to this, she insisted on following it up later with additional bursts of the product.

My Experience

I followed suit. And I must admit I snuffled not once all last winter. There were drawbacks: the numerous products I purchased, mislaid, bought again, found, etc. And that dispiriting moment you realise you’ve sat on the little vessel of hand gel stored in your pocket and it’s now splurging everywhere. Still, a small cost for the benefit. And now winter’s upon us again, I'm fully prepared with her prevention arsenal. I'm set for the fight.

DB
Written by

David Burnett

AI researcher and tech writer focusing on machine learning applications and digital transformation strategies.

Vertex Signal

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